


Hot & Cold

by Fernon



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, College, Drinking, Drinking Games, Friends With Benefits, Light Angst, Like lowkey smut, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Nothing serious though, On-Again/Off-Again Relationship, References to Drugs, Smut, Unrequited Love, jeonghan is lowkey a pothead too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2020-07-09 08:33:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19884691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fernon/pseuds/Fernon
Summary: Seungcheol meets Jeonghan at a party, and he's pretty sure he falls in love with him. Unfortunately, Jeonghan likes to play games.





	Hot & Cold

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so the smut is not really quite smut, because I'm a coward and won't write any further into it. Jeonghan, Joshua, and Vernon smoke pot once in a while (mostly at parties). This also ended up being WAY longer than intended but y'know. Enjoy.  
> (I also didn't realize that my account turned a year old today! Guess this was an unintentional 1 year anniversary lol)

Seungcheol first met Jeonghan at the biggest party on campus, the Halloween Bash that’s held by one of the big frats on campus. It’s a party that’s well known about, and something of a tradition to the frat, as well as the school. Seungcheol had been invited by his American friend, who’s a member of the frat, named Joshua. He had told them to dress up, because, duh, it’s a Halloween party, and Seungcheol was  _ dreading it _ . He was down to party, but with how the campus was buzzing about this party, Seungcheol wouldn’t like it. 

The house is crowded, Seungcheol can see the people from here, since the crowd spills out onto the lawns and the decks of the house, and he can see across backyards, to the pool, which is full of people considering it’s October. They’re playing volleyball and laughing. Party music pours out the windows and across the lawn, and bass carries down the street, as Seungcheol and his group wanders down the street towards the bash. 

Seungcheol went for the classic ‘greaser’ look, because he was lazy, and it’s just about the easiest costume to pull off. His hair is slicked back, and he found the best white t-shirt he had, and threw a leather jacket over it. He rolled up the cuffs of his jeans, and threw on a pair of old high tops, and called it a day.

Wonwoo, his roommate, is on his arm, sort of hiding behind him. He’s not much for people, or parties, or crowds, but he came out voluntarily, and is a bit afraid. He’s dressed as James Bond, complete with a cheap suit, suave hair, and surprisingly, contacts. Even Seungcheol had to do a double take, because Wonwoo’s cat eyes are typically framed with circular wire-rimmed glasses, and his hair flops down in his face, and band tees are 100 percent of his wardrobe.

Seokmin, Seungcheol’s other friend, has a crown on his head, and a cheap cloak that looks like it’s made of fur, and a fake sword at his side, with a button down (which is, mostly buttoned down, showing more chest and torso than really necessary) and slacks on, and his hair is natural and curly under his crown. 

Chan, their youngest friend, jogs up a side street to meet them at the intersection, dressed as a classic angel, in a light blue button down with a white vest over it, and white jeans. He’s got some dollar-store Halloween gear as well- little feathery wings attached with velcro to his back, and a little halo above his head. His hair is down in their usual bangs, and he’s got a pink lip tint on, and a small amount of blush dusts his cheeks. “Cheol, hey!” Chan beams, and waves to the group. “Seokmin, Wonwoo, hi.” Chan ducks his head respectfully. 

“Awe! You look so good, Channie!” Seokmin coos and pats the younger boy’s cheek.

“You look… sultry? But uh, classy.” Chan says, laughing a little. Seokmin grins.

“Thank you Channie! You ready for your first frat party?”

“No.” Chan laughs nervously. 

“It’s okay, none of us are. Especially not Wonu here.” Seungcheol pats Wonwoo’s shoulder, with a chuckle. Wonwoo nearly flinches at that. 

“What?” Wonwoo blinks in confusion. 

“Nothing, sweetie. We’re talking about you.” Seokmin laughs. Wonwoo pouts and sends a glare in Seokmin’s direction. 

They arrive at the lawn of the party, and stand there for a moment and stare at the house, people whooping out the windows and laughing. “Well, here we go…” Seungcheol sucks in a breath, and leads his little group into the masses, people greeting them and complementing their costumes. Seokmin makes it a point to flirt with everyone, and Wonwoo clings ever closer to Seungcheol and Chan, as guys and girls throw compliments his way. Seungcheol can see the blush creep onto his cheeks. They walk through generic costumes- vampires, drunk guys in rubber horse- head masks, guys in hawaiian shirts, girls dressed as devils, and a few people in Iron Man t-shirts. 

Seungcheol guides them to the kitchen, and makes a little corner for them, telling them to text him and meet him back here when they’re ready to leave. Seokmin beams and agrees, and then wanders off to find a drink, and someone to flirt with. Chan offers to stay with Wonwoo, who looks terrified of being stuck on his own. A few girls approach, and fall into a drunken flirtation with Wonwoo, who just kinda blinks and stays silent. Seungcheol watches the scene for a moment, and Chan, being the (literal) angel he is, dives in with them, playing Wonwoo up, and getting cooed at by the girls. Seungcheol leaves them, and wanders back through the kitchen.

“Here, have a beer!” Someone shouts and stuffs a cold, unopened bottle of beer into his hands, and slips back into the crowd. People in the living room are dancing, and some people are laying on the dining room table as he passes, doing body shots, and a table of mostly empty jello shots sits in the corner of the room. Seungcheol shakes his head and keeps looking, searching for Joshua.

Speak of the devil, he just happens to step into the hallway out of a room, dressed in full police uniform, and nearly jumps when he sees Seungcheol. “Cheol! You made it! And you look good! Nonnie, come look at Cheol! Cheol, you gotta meet my boyfriend, Vernon!”

The hallway is pretty dim, and Joshua is tugging a younger boy out into the hallway. He’s wearing a sleeveless striped shirt and black pants, and they drew fake tattoos along his arms with sharpie- Seungcheol is pretty sure someone doodled a tiny dick in the middle of it all. Handcuffs dangle off of one of his wrists, and he gives Seungcheol a grin. 

“Hey! So you’re the all-famed Seungcheol I’ve heard of.” Vernon grins. “Criminal justice major, right? You’re not gonna bust us, right?” Vernon laughs, and Seungcheol rolls his eyes. This kid is high off his ass. 

“No, Vernon. I’m not even trying to become a cop. How much have you  _ smoked?” _

“Not a lot. Just a blunt or two. You wanna join?” Vernon smirks, and Joshua giggles at his side. 

“ _ I’m  _ the cop, remember Nonnie?” Joshua laughs and gestures to his cheap Halloween-store uniform, and Vernon laughs, holding up the cuffs. 

“Well, I’ve been naughty, officer,” Vernon bites his lip and smirks at Joshua.

“Hot damn,” Joshua says, eyeing Vernon up and down.

“Oh, good fucking lord! You guys are fucking gross, go away with that shit. I just came to tell you guys I actually showed.” Seungcheol grimaces at their antics, and then the door of the bedroom opens, and there stands a man, who Seungcheol on the spot dubs as the most beautiful human being he’s ever seen. 

He’s got long dark hair, styled in waves around his shoulders, a pair of round, 1960’s era sunglasses perched on the end of his nose, and he’s dressed in a white suit with bell bottom pants, and white go-go boots under them, and he’s got a dopey grin on his face. A haze of smoke swirls around him, and Seungcheol is hit with the acrid smell of weed, but is still awestruck by the man before him. 

“What’s going on out here?” His voice is gentle, but not high in pitch, and it caresses Seungcheol’s ears. Seungcheol can only blink.

“Hannie! This is Seungcheol! My best friend!” Joshua grins and gestures to Seungcheol. 

“Oh, you’re Seungcheol? Nice to finally put a face to the name. And a damn nice face you have.” The man winks at him, biting his lip a little. “I’m Jeonghan. Well, I’m supposed to be John Lennon for today, but y’know, that’s okay.”

Seungcheol’s mouth is dry and there’s an embarrassed blush on his cheeks. “Nice costume, Jeonghan… I’ve heard things about you, too.” Seungcheol nods, recalling all of Joshua’s tales involving Jeonghan. 

“All good things, I’d hope. Unless he’s told you about the bad things I’ve done, and you like that. I’ll do them all again, for you.” Jeonghan practically purrs at Seungcheol, and Seungcheol can feel the all-too-familiar feeling of arousal hitting him. Jeonghan is smooth like scotch, and just as bad for him, too, Seungcheol can already tell. 

“N-no, just good things…” Seungcheol manages to get out. 

Jeonghan pouts. “Damn, he’s straight isn’t he?! Joshua! Why are all your stupid friends straight?”

“He’s not straight, Han. Just awkward.” Joshua laughs and pats Seungcheol’s shoulder. “Lets save the last gram for later, you two go dance!” Joshua practically shoves Jeonghan out of the room, and tugs Vernon inside, slamming the door shut and locking it. 

“They’re going to fuck. You want to find something to eat?” Jeonghan holds a hand out for Seungcheol, who gladly accepts, internally groaning at the thought of what’s going to go on behind that door. Jeonghan leads him downstairs, rummaging through cupboards to find some snacks, and he sits on the counter and opens a bag of chips he found, and pops a few in his mouth. 

“So, you’re a criminal justice major? Whatcha planning to do with that?” Jeonghan asks. 

“Not sure, maybe a PI or a detective. I thought about joining the academy but I know too many people who do illegal things and I don’t think I could live with a guilty conscious knowing that I’d have to pretend I didn’t know.” 

“A goody two shoes, huh?” Jeonghan laughs, and offers the chips to Seungcheol. Seungcheol takes a few, and munches on them. 

“Guess so.” Seungcheol shrugs, then takes a couple more swigs of the beer he’s been holding onto. 

“Yet you dressed like a 1950’s bad boy?” Jeonghan smirks. “How ironic. It’s hot though.”

“You think so?”

“Hell yeah. I’m a nursing major. It’s boring as hell, but honestly, I like the idea that I’m going to help a lot of people as a nurse. Pretty cliche.” Jeonghan shrugs.

“That’s… yeah, kinda cliche.” Seungcheol laughs. 

“Anyways. You wanna dance?” Jeonghan says. 

“Sure.” Seungcheol says, and Jeonghan grabs onto Seungcheol’s shoulders and tugs him close, making Seungcheol stumble a little, and Jeonghan holds onto him while he hops down off the counter, and then takes Seungcheol’s hand and leads him to the living room, with the writhing mass of dancing drunk people. Jeonghan finds them a little space in the midst of it all. Seungcheol wrinkles his nose at the smell of cheap alcohol and sweaty adolescents. 

Jeonghan sways to the beat, his hips swinging back and forth in some sort of tempting move, and Seungcheol finds one of his hands reaching for those hips, and he finds himself swaying too, head bobbing a little to the beat. Jeonghan is singing along, he thinks, because his lips are moving and his eyes are closed, and his hands are finding their way to Seungcheol’s shoulders.

They get pressed together, the space Jeonghan had found now diminished to just about nothing, and Jeonghan is turning in a little circle, laughing, and shaking his ass like there’s no tomorrow. He doesn’t have much of an ass, but Seungcheol just enjoys the view anyways. He finishes the beer, and puts it somewhere, honestly he doesn’t know where, but it’s not in his hands anymore. He’s too focused on Jeonghan dancing to really care about anything else. 

Jeonghan moves closer to him, his hands sliding down Seungcheol’s back, his fingertips ghosting along Seungcheol’s spine, in a way that makes him shiver, and then Jeonghan rolls his hips into Seungcheol’s with a smirk. Jeonghan shifts a bit when someone calls for him, and he turns, grinning at a round-faced boy, who’s giving him a thumbs up, and Jeonghan laughs, and it’s a devilishly good sound, something sultry and revealing, yet somehow mysterious all at once. He throws his head back, hair falling off his shoulders, and there’s a wicked gleam in his eye when he straightens his head again to look at the round-faced boy, and then turns completely away from Seungcheol, and presses his ass back into Seungcheol’s crotch, and  _ grinds _ on him. 

Seungcheol thinks he’s going to pass out, all the blood draining from his face, and pooling in his crotch. He tries not to think about it, hoping that Jeonghan doesn’t notice (or maybe praying that he does, and is willing to  _ do something _ about it), but his grip on Jeonghan’s hips is tightening, and he’s clenching his jaw in hopes that he’s not fucking any of this up. 

“What’s going on, Seungcheol?” Jeonghan glances at Seungcheol, eyes wide with feigned innocence. Seungcheol wishes he could fight the red-hot embarrassment creeping on his face.

“Nothing…” Seungcheol tries to move away, only to get knocked back into Jeonghan by some rowdy dancers behind Seungcheol. Seungcheol knows Jeonghan can feel his arousal, and Jeonghan turns to him with a wink. 

“You having a bit of an issue there, Cheollie?” Jeonghan smirks, and peers over the rims of his sunglasses at Seungcheol, turning to face him. 

“N-no! No…” Seungcheol looks away, face red, eyes wide. 

“Oh, come on, Cheollie. You can tell me what’s going on,” Jeonghan purrs, fingers ghosting over Seungcheol’s shirt collar and running down his chest. Seungcheol remains silent, which apparently, prompts Jeonghan. “You  _ want _ me, don’t you?” Jeonghan leans his head in and nips at Seungcheol’s neck, peppering a few kisses against his skin. 

“Uh…” Seungcheol replies, rather eloquently. 

“Come on then, let’s say we get out of here?” Jeonghan straightens and leans up to ghost a kiss upon Seungcheol’s lips. 

“I- alright.” Seungcheol murmurs, and Jeonghan grabs his arm and guides him away, dragging him outside and down the street to an older brick building, that Seungcheol recognizes as a branch of student housing. Seokmin lives in a building much like this one, on a different block. Jeonghan leads him up a flight of stairs to the second floor, and down a hall, stopping in front of a door, reading ‘ _ Apt. 27’,  _ and unlocking the door. He opens the door, and pushes Seungcheol through the doorway, sending him stumbling through the dark. He trips and nearly falls, just as Jeonghan flips a lightswitch, and grabs onto Seungcheol. 

They don’t even make it to Jeonghan’s room, just through the tiny kitchenette area to the ‘living room’ with enough space for a couch and a TV. Jeonghan pushes him down onto the couch and climbs into his lap, grabbing a hold of his face and kissing him hungrily.

Seungcheol’s eyes flutter shut and he grabs onto Jeonghan’s hips, and kisses him back, hot and wet, practically begging for more. Jeonghan’s tongue slips into his mouth, and his hands reach up for Seungcheol’s hair, grabbing on and tugging a little, driving Seungcheol a little wild. 

Their hands roam one another, as if searching for something, and they sneak under clothing like they’re on a secret mission, their fingertips ghosting along parts of each other, seeking out what makes the other tick, seeking to draw out little sounds of pleasure from one another. Eventually Jeonghan moves away from the kiss, and Seungcheol chases after his lips, wanting more, but Jeonghan just starts kissing along his jaw and down his neck, biting down on spots and making Seungcheol moan. Jeonghan smirks against his skin and rolls his hips into Seungcheol’s, drawing a lewd moan from his own lips at the contact. 

Seungcheol wants to hear more of that, he thinks, so he bucks his hips up against Jeonghan’s and grinds against him, drawing more filthy sounds from Jeonghan. Seungcheol’s hands grab at Jeonghan’s clothes, wanting more, wanting to see some skin, almost as if out of desperation. He whines when Jeonghan pushes his hands away, and smirks. “My room, Seungcheol. This couch is shitty and old, and the material doesn’t feel great on bare skin. Trust me. I walk around this place naked, regularly.” 

Seungcheol’s mind goes blank at that thought, and his mouth waters. What is he, some kind of animal? Seungcheol doesn’t know, but he hasn’t had sex since shortly before his ex broke up with him a year ago, and he’s feeling uncontrollably  _ needy _ all of a sudden. Jeonghan slips out of his lap and over to a door, his hips swinging enticingly as he goes, and disappears into the room behind the door. Seungcheol trails after him, and sees a tiny bedroom, most of the space taken by a queen-size bed. 

“I brought my own. Fuck dorm beds, they’re so narrow and awkward.” Jeonghan says, as he undoes the buttons on his white Lennon-costume-shirt, and shrugs it off his shoulders. His sunglasses already lost somewhere, he just stands there in his weird white bell bottoms, illuminated by the moonlight streaming through gaps in the blinds, looking fucking  _ ethereal _ . Seungcheol stares for a few moments before Jeonghan clears his throat. 

“You’re beautiful,” Seungcheol whispers. Something flashes over Jeonghan’s face, something like confliction- full of delight, then a wave of fear, or nerves. A blush creeps onto Jeonghan’s cheeks, and Seungcheol shrugs his jacket off, dropping it on the floor behind him and moving forward to take Jeonghan’s cheeks gently in his hands and kiss him. The kiss is something much sweeter and softer than the kisses that had happened before it. 

There’s something tender, like Seungcheol is pouring his new found affections for Jeonghan into it, and it’s something much less filthy and desperate than their last kisses. Until Jeonghan is pulling away and shoving Seungcheol back onto the bed, and straddling his lap once more, tugging his shirt off. 

Seungcheol wakes a while later, tangled in sheets, in a cold and empty bed. The shower is running in the next room over, which Seungcheol can only assume is Jeonghan’s bathroom, and sees that it’s almost two in the morning. A short nap, Seungcheol supposes, they finished 

their wild hookup at about midnight, and Seungcheol had promptly fallen asleep after. He’s about to close his eyes when he hears a buzzing, someone’s phone going off. The phone on the nightstand, presumably Jeonghan’s, is still, and silent.

So Seungcheol goes searching for his phone, picking up his underwear and shirt as he goes, slipping them on his body, until he find his jeans, his phone still tucked safely away in his back pocket. 7 missed calls from Seokmin, 78 messages in their group chat, another 5 missed calls from Chan, and 14 messages from Wonwoo himself...

Fucking shit. Seungcheol was supposed to meet them to walk them home. “Shit, shit, shit, shit…” Seungcheol tugs his pants back on, just as Jeonghan is entering the bedroom again. 

“Oh, good you’re up. I was going to tell you your phone was going off like crazy, but I was gonna wake you up anyways because I need to change the sheets on my bed. What’s going on?” Jeonghan raises an eyebrow. 

“I was supposed to walk my friends home from the party, I look like such an asshole now! Shit… I’ve got to go!” Seungcheol makes for the door, but pauses. “Wait, Jeonghan?”

Jeonghan, who had already begun tugging the sheets off his bed, stops and turns to look at Seungcheol. “Hmm?”

“Can I get your number?” Seungcheol asks hopefully. Jeonghan looks like he’s pondering for a moment, but then shrugs. 

“I suppose. I don’t normally want more contact with a hookup, but you’re friends with Joshua, so you’re probably cool.” Jeonghan says, seeming aloof. Something in his chest pangs at the word hookup, knowing that this is what this was, but feeling let down that Jeonghan doesn’t seem to be interested in anything more. 

Seungcheol doesn’t hear the end of it when he gets home, Wonwoo roasting him to a thousand pieces, and Seokmin laughing, because Wonwoo is really being overdramatic, but Chan chimes in that ‘they’re all pissed, but glad that he’s safe, and it’s not truly that big of a deal,’ which makes Seungcheol feel something close to relief. Then they question the backwards shirt, and the mussed hair, and the hickeys along his neck, and Seungcheol flushes with embarrassment as they all let out cheers and start to tease him. 

“Who’s the lucky guy, eh, Cheol?” Seokmin winks and nudges him with his elbow. 

“Jeonghan. He’s a uh, nursing major? I guess?” Seungcheol says quietly. 

“Like. Yoon Jeonghan? Seungkwan’s friend?” Chan says incredulously. 

“I don’t know, I don’t know his last name or Seungkwan.” Seungcheol shrugs defensively.

“Holy shit dude.” Wonwoo says. “I can’t believe you ditched us for a hookup!”

Seungcheol hangs his head in shame, takes a shower, and goes to bed. 

Seungcheol doesn’t run into Jeonghan again for a few weeks. When he does, it’s outside of the library, and Jeonghan is bundled up in a fluffy winter jacket, braced against the chill of the November breeze. His hair is blowing gently in the wind, and he looks like he’s in a hair commercial, with how luscious his locks are. A fluffy scarf is wrapped around his neck about a hundred times, and his chin and cheeks  _ just _ peek out above them, making him look rather adorable. 

“Hey, Jeonghan!” Seungcheol calls. Jeonghan looks up from his phone, and gives a rather displeased look to Seungcheol. 

“Oh. It’s you.” Jeonghan says. His tone isn’t harsh, but Seungcheol’s heart pangs a little at the lack of enthusiasm. 

“Yeah, it’s me, hi. Where are you headed?”

“To get coffee. Where else would I be going?” Jeonghan rolls his eyes a little. 

“Can I join you?” Seungcheol tries. Jeonghan shakes his head. 

“No, I’m fine alone.” Jeonghan states, and brushes past him. Seungcheol blinks, and then hurries after him. 

“I’ll pay. I was headed to get a cup of cocoa myself.” Seungcheol tries again. Jeonghan pauses. 

“If you’re paying. You can join me. But I only have an hour before my next class.” Jeonghan walks into the coffee shop, leaving Seungcheol trailing behind him, a bit conflicted as to why Jeonghan is being so cold. He decides to blame it on a lack of caffeine. 

Jeonghan orders some sort of cappuccino and Seungcheol gets himself a hot cocoa, hugging it in his cold hands, blowing on it a little to get it to cool. He’s sitting across from Jeonghan, who is silent and playing on his phone, so Seungcheol pokes at the marshmallows in his cocoa cup, popping them under the cocoa and watching them bob back up to the surface. He starts blowing on it again, until he feels eyes on him. He pauses and looks up at Jeonghan, cheeks still puffed with air. 

Jeonghan giggles. He fucking  _ giggles. _ And Seungcheol thinks it’s the best sound that he’s ever heard come from Jeonghan. He could listen to that sound forever, no matter what.

“What are you doing? Didn’t your mother tell you not to play with your food?” Jeonghan raises an eyebrow, but a smile still plays on his lips. Seungcheol’s cheeks go pink. 

“Well- I mean this is a drink, so it’s kind of technically not food…” Seungcheol trails off. 

“Fair point.” Jeonghan states, taking a sip of the foam from his mug. He licks it off his lip and Seungcheol can’t help but watch as his tongue darts over his lips. He looks back up into Jeonghan’s eyes, and they’re back on his phone, playing some game. “So. What kind of music do you listen to?”

“Oh, uh. Mostly whatever is on the radio, I guess. Sometimes I listen to dance music, but my friend Chan is a dancer so that’s all his influence,” Seungcheol nods. He can’t help but feel awkward about everything. “What about you?”

“I like classical music. With orchestras and stuff. And I like rap. Not like. Soundcloud shit. That’s no good. And I like jazz. That’s it.” Jeonghan says. 

“Orchestral music? Any reason?” Seungcheol asks. 

“I was in band for most of my life. I played piano, and violin, and clarinet. And I sang jazz. That’s about it.”

“Are you in any groups in college?” 

“Yeah, I auditioned for the orchestra at college. Second chair violin,” Jeonghan says nonchalantly before he sips more of his cappuccino. Seungcheol blinks in awe. 

“Really?! That’s amazing! Can I hear you play sometime?” Seungcheol is barely finished speaking the words when Jeonghan cuts in with a sharp and abrupt reply.

“No.”

Seungcheol is quiet for a few minutes after that, when Jeonghan looks back down at his phone and plays. Seungcheol returns to blowing on his cocoa, the steam billowing back up into his face and warming his cheeks. 

“Where you from? I can’t help but notice your accent is a little different. Like, you normally speak a different dialect.” Jeonghan asks after a few more minutes of silence. 

“Daegu.” Seungcheol says rather curtly. Jeonghan nods. 

“I thought so,” is all Seungcheol receives in reply, and he’s not sure what else to say. He manages a few sips of cocoa before he brainstorms a new question. 

“You like cats or dogs?”

Jeonghan stops and looks up at him, staring rather blank-faced. “What are you asking me this for?”

“I just wondered. You don’t seem like much of a dog person.”

“I’m not. I like small dogs, but mostly I prefer cats.”

“That’s good to know. How do you know Joshua?”

“We smoke together? And he was in my literature class my freshman year.” Jeonghan states, rather briskly.

“Ah, right. You guys are close?” Seungcheol tries again. He’s not sure if this is how Jeonghan normally acts, or if he did something wrong. Jeonghan sighs.

“Yeah, I suppose. Look, I should be going. Thanks for the coffee.” Jeonghan throws back the last few swigs of his cappuccino and brings it to the counter, and walks out. 

Seungcheol just watches him go, and then waits a few minutes. 

_ Hey, coffee was nice. We should do it again sometime. :)  _

He hits send, and shuts his phone off, setting it aside and sipping more of his hot chocolate. 

After that, Seungcheol can’t seem to get away from Jeonghan. He suddenly seems to be everywhere and nowhere all at once. He passes him every other day in the hallway, and Seungcheol sometimes catches him in the cafeteria for lunch. He sits with him once or twice, and only for a few minutes, before Jeonghan is hurrying off to classes. 

The next time he sees Jeonghan and truly gets to spend any time with him is after an invite to Joshua’s, to play some board games and eat Christmas cookies. It’s the beginning of December, and the snow is falling outside, and Seungcheol, Joshua, Vernon, Chan, and Chan’s friend Seungkwan are all cutting out shapes in premade cookie dough. Little snowmen and trees, and stars and snowflakes (none of which are going to come out right, Seungcheol thinks) sit on trays and get put in the oven to bake. 

Jeonghan shows up late, snowflakes in his hair, his eyes slightly bloodshot, and smelling faintly of weed. It’s still not a good smell, Seungcheol thinks, but the cologne that Jeonghan has on makes Seungcheol absolutely want to devour him. It’s something smooth, dark, and just slightly sweet, and it’s strong, but in a good way. He’s got on a lavender colored sweater, and his jeans are dark blue and torn all up his legs, and his hair is in some sort of braid and thrown over his shoulder, and Seungcheol can’t seem to think about anything but how absolutely stunning Jeonghan looks this evening. 

He sits at the last available spot beside Seungcheol, but he’s not tense, for once. He gives Seungcheol a smile, which sends a fleet of warm and fuzzy feelings to flood Seungcheol’s system. 

“Hey, guys. Where those cookies at?” Jeonghan asks. Joshua laughs and informs him that they’re baking right now, and that they had spent time cutting them out earlier. Jeonghan apologizes for being late, but tells Joshua that he met up with their dealer, and he got him the few grams that he owed him. Seungcheol and Chan share a look of unenthusiasm across the table. Jeonghan was preparing for another party the night before everyone left for winter break, and Seungcheol was again, dreading it. 

Jeonghan joins in on their next round of games, Joshua momentarily pausing the game to pull cookies out of the oven and put the next ones in. Jeonghan turns to Seungcheol. “What are you doing on Sunday?”

Seungcheol blinks. “Sunday? Uh… Nothing, I think.” 

“Cool, I’m planning on a Lord of the Rings marathon- only the Hobbit part, though. You have to watch the prequel before the actual movie. You wanna watch them with me?”

When the  _ fuck _ did Jeonghan suddenly invite  _ Seungcheol  _ to hang out? Is this a new step forward for their friendship? Seungcheol pauses. 

“Wait, aren’t all those movies like three hours long?”

“Yeah but if we start at like. 10 in the morning we can be done by like 11 at night. Wait, have you never seen them?” Jeonghan’s eyes widen. 

“No, actually…” Seungcheol watches as horror and disgust flickers over Jeonghan’s face. 

“That’s it! Now you  _ have _ to come over! No questions.” Jeonghan states. Seungcheol flushes and nods.

“Alright…” He nods, and Jeonghan beams.

“Yay! See, I told you Seungcheol would watch the Hobbit movies with me!”

Joshua groans from the kitchenette area. “Thank god! Do you know how many times he’s made me watch them since last semester? At least six. And same with Lord of the Rings.”

“Really?” Seungcheol laughs, and Jeonghan pouts. 

“He’s a Harry Potter nerd. You say ‘Harry Potter’ and he’s sold. Too bad I tricked him.” Jeonghan laughs. 

“I don’t even  _ like  _ Lord of the Rings!” Joshua throws his hands in the air and draws a card for the game. 

“Which is a crime,” Jeonghan states, and then takes his turn. 

“I can agree with that. They’re beautifully well done, Shua.” Vernon chimes in. Joshua looks hurt. 

“I can’t believe you, my own boyfriend, would say that!” Joshua feigns hurt. 

“They’re good movies, what can I say?” Vernon shrugs and watches as Seungcheol takes his turn.

“Let’s frost cookies!” Seungkwan grins. 

And so, the night goes on, the friends making a mess of the frosting, and getting too competitive over card games. They’ve gorged themselves on poorly decorated (but still delicious) cutout cookies and are playing a round of mostly sober Cards Against Humanity, when Seungcheol feels a hand creeping up his thigh. Immediately he can feel his cheeks flushing, and he spares a glance at Jeonghan, who has an ever so slight smirk on his lips, as he stares devilishly at his hand of cards. 

He traces patterns on Seungcheol’s thighs, letting his hand creep farther up Seungcheol’s lap. Seungcheol tries not to squirm, growing ever aroused at the contact. Seungcheol is the card reader next, and much to his dismay, Jeonghan decides that it’s the opportune moment to brush his hand along Seungcheol’s dick. 

Seungcheol nearly chokes on his words, face heating up, eyes widening in shock, but he manages some form of composure as Jeonghan palms him through his jeans. Seungcheol can’t even bother paying enough attention to the cards pulled, even though a few of them illicit hysterical laughter from the other friends, his mind too focused on the hand stroking along his dick. Seungcheol bites down on his tongue, and digs his nails into his palms, willing his whole body not to react, and chooses a card at random, and when the winner cheers, and the round continues on to Jeonghan, the hand is gone, just as quickly as it had gotten there. 

Seungcheol’s whole body seems to relax (except a certain part that seems to want to betray him for the slightest idea of sex and Jeonghan) and he lets out a breath of relief. Jeonghan takes his turn as the card czar, and then it moves on to Chan, and his hand returns to Seungcheol’s thigh, tracing little patterns once again, and creeping slowly up his leg. Seungcheol knows now, what’s going to happen when the round makes its way back around to Seungcheol, and the second he draws the black card to be read, Jeonghan’s palming him again, and Seungcheol lets out a strangled sound, which he plays off as the beginning of a cough. 

Jeonghan snickers behind his cards, a smirk on his face, and a wicked glint in his eyes. Seungcheol has half a brain to glare at him and push his hand off for playing such games, and the other half of his brain is numb with arousal and on a one way street to bonerville. Seungcheol makes it through, yet again, unfocused on the game, before Jeonghan takes his turn, and then Chan announces he’s won, that he has gotten a whole seven cards. 

It’s almost midnight now, and Seungkwan announces he’s ready to sleep, so he gathers up the cards, and heads out. Jeonghan stands, his hand completely removed from Seungcheol’s thighs now, and walked to the kitchenette in the other room. Joshua strikes up a conversation with Seungcheol and Chan, and it’s pleasant, and asking about finals, and the party, when a voice is calling for ‘Cheollie.’

Seungcheol raises an eyebrow, and Joshua shrugs, excusing Seungcheol from the conversation, and focusing his attention on Vernon again, Chan texting someone back on his phone. Thank  _ god _ that no one is paying attention, because Seungcheol has a rather large, noticeable hard-on in his pants, and he just tugs the hem of his sweatshirt over it, relieved that it’s oversized enough to hide the problem, and makes his way to the kitchen. Jeonghan is sitting there, with a glass on the counter, full of water, and a smirk on his lips. 

“When they ask, it’s because I couldn’t reach a glass on the top shelf. You want me to take care of that problem, wait ten minutes after I leave, and meet me at my apartment. You remember where it is, right?” Jeonghan’s voice is low, his tone sultry, and his intentions wicked. Seungcheol can only nod dumbly in response. “Good. I’ll be waiting, knock when you get there and I’ll let you in.” Jeonghan has moved closer, and nips at the skin behind his ear, and then grabs his glass and walks back to the living room, with the others. Seungcheol trails after him. 

Jeonghan finishes his glass of water and announces that he’s leaving, after the five of them chat for a few minutes more, and everyone says their goodbyes. Seungcheol can’t help but glance at the time on his phone screen every thirty seconds, it seems, because the ten minutes before Jeonghan told him to leave seem to drag on. Finally, Seungcheol stretches a little, and stands, announcing that he, too, is going to head home. Chan says goodbye, and informs him that he’s going to stay here for the night. Seungcheol slips out the door after a wave from Joshua and Vernon, and starts making his way through the streets to Jeonghan’s house. 

He arrives in front of the door on the second floor, labeled  _ ‘Apt. 27’ _ and stares at it for a few moments (or closer to minutes) debating if this is a good decision.

He knocks anyways. 

The door swings open, revealing Jeonghan in just a tiny silk robe that dips down in a deep, loose ‘v’ shape on his chest, hanging off his left shoulder, a show of smooth unblemished skin, that Seungcheol wants nothing more than to press kisses over. The robe is short enough that it hardly covers Jeonghan’s ass, and allows for a show of his long, thin legs. Seungcheol drinks in the sight, and looks up to Jeonghan’s face. 

His signature smirk plays on his beautiful rosy colored lips, and Seungcheol finds his brain on autopilot as he surges forward and tugs Jeonghan close to him, kissing him hungrily. Jeonghan kicks the door shut and they stumble towards Jeonghan’s room, their hands flitting over every part of one another, grabbing and squeezing, desperate for more contact.

“What the fuck was that about, earlier?” Seungcheol breathes out against Jeonghan’s lips, and Jeonghan laughs a low, sultry, giggle of a laugh, and its fucking  _ sexy _ , just like everything Jeonghan does. 

“That was the hook, baby.” Jeonghan practically purrs. “Had to find some way to convince you to come here.” Jeonghan tugs at Seungcheol’s hair as Seungcheol presses kisses down Jeonghan’s neck and collarbones, biting little marks into his skin.

“You could have just asked, Jeonghan. I would have been more than glad to.” Seungcheol says between kisses. He spares a glance up at Jeonghan, whose face is red with some sort of embarrassment. Is  _ the _ Yoon Jeonghan embarrassed? Jeonghan chokes on a reply, and pulls Seungcheol in for a kiss again instead, distracting his lips from trying to make a reply. 

Seungcheol wakes the next morning to an empty bed again, the sheets clean and smelling like fresh laundry from when they changed them last night. Seungcheol’s hair is dry now from his shower, and suffering massive bedhead. He sits up, stretching, and looks around for Jeonghan. No sign of him. Seungcheol slips from bed, having borrowed a pair of sweatpants from Jeonghan last night as well, and he begins searching for the other. The bathroom door is open, and the light is off, and so he makes his way to the living room, where Jeonghan sits in a hoodie and shorts, hood up, and a bowl of cereal between his hands. 

“Oh, you’re up. There’s cereal on the counter, if you want some, and milk in the fridge. If you want to, and don’t have anything going on today, we can get started on our Hobbit marathon now?” Jeonghan looks at him, and Seungcheol nods. 

“Yeah, okay.” He’s not really sure what else to say. It’s almost 11, he has nothing else to do today, and he’s still not quite awake yet, so he just pours himself a bowl of cereal and joins Jeonghan on the couch. Jeonghan finishes his cereal and runs to his room, and comes back with pillows and fluffy blankets, and then he puts the first movie on, and snuggles up, with his head in Seungcheol’s lap. 

Seungcheol focuses in on the movie, and finishes his cereal in a few minutes. Eventually he finds himself setting his cereal bowl down, and his hands settling in his lap (and on Jeonghan’s head because that’s currently occupying his lap too), and then eventually he finds himself twisting the ends of Jeonghan’s hair between his fingers, and his fingers carding through his long locks, and gently massaging Jeonghan’s scalp. 

It feels domestic, somehow, and soft, much softer than anything he’s ever experienced from Jeonghan (he doesn’t even seem to be much for cuddling after sex), because everything he’s known from Jeonghan has been sex, or the cold shoulder. It’s a strange feeling, but it’s a good feeling, one that makes Seungcheol all happy inside, and makes him feel mushy. It’s a feeling he likes. A lot. 

Monday, Jeonghan is back to being cold again. Seungcheol tries to join him for the walk to their classes, and Jeonghan is brusk, and pushing Seungcheol away again. Seungcheol pouts. They had talked so much this weekend, during their Lord of the Rings marathon on Sunday, and Seungcheol thought he was getting somewhere with Jeonghan for once. He lets Jeonghan walk on, just watching him go, with sad eyes, before he continues his walk on his own. Seokmin finds him, at some point during his walk, and his brows furrow. 

“Cheollie! You look sad. What’s wrong?” Seokmin asks, a pout on his lips. 

“I don’t know. I thought I was getting somewhere with Jeonghan, finally, but he’s being cold again,” Seungcheol sighs, still looking down at his feet as they shuffle through the thin layer of fluffy snow. He burrows further into his scarf and jacket, shivering a little at the icy breeze. 

“Jeonghan? Like the Jeonghan you hooked up with at the Halloween bash?” Seokmin raises an eyebrow. 

“Yeah. I- Joshua had a couple of us over, and we hooked up again Friday night. And then he invited me to watch his favorite movie series with him, both Saturday and Sunday. Just  _ last night _ , he told me he would walk with me to class today, and I met up with him and he blew me off.”

“Cheol… That sucks.” Seokmin is frowning now, and patting Seungcheol’s arm reassuringly. “He’s a dick.”

“No, he’s really not. He’s sweet, I talked with him so much this weekend, and I kinda like him. He’s talented and he’s so multifaceted, he’s not just his facade of flirting and sex, like he makes himself out to be. He’s ticklish, and he likes when people play with his hair. And he likes lame jokes, like puns and dad jokes and shit, but pretends to be unamused by them when other people tell them. It’s like some kind of wall, and I don’t know if I should even bother trying to get around it, because I don’t know if he sees me as anything more than a hook up. Or a mutual friend.”

“Well that sucks even worse. Maybe he’s just scared. Maybe he’s just aloof. Maybe he’s just oblivious? Who knows, Seungcheol. But take it easy with him, yeah? You fall for people too quickly because you care so much.” Seokmin says. “I’ll see you later, yeah? Tell Wonwoo I said hi.” Seokmin waves and heads into the technology building, where he’s being forced to take some lame ass computer classes that he bitches about all the time. 

Joshua’s end of the semester winter party rolls around a week later, and Jeonghan is a whirlwind of smoke as he grinds on some guy in the crowd, higher than the stars that shone in his eyes, smiling that smile of his that was somewhere between sassy, adorable, and sultry. Seungcheol sits on a counter, staring at him dancing, getting not even a glance from him this whole time. Wonwoo said he’s sulking, yet he’s sitting beside Seungcheol, beer in hand, avoiding the party-goers. Chan was lost a long time ago, probably somewhere in the dancing crowd, laughing and flirting with people. 

“Stop moping, Cheol,” Wonwoo states.

“I’m not moping,” Seungcheol mumbles.

“Then you’re giving jealous death glares to the guy that Jeonghan is grinding on,” Wonwoo offers. Seungcheol shakes his head.

“No, I’m not jealous. Jeonghan and I- we’re not dating. He can dance with whoever he wants to.”

“Sure, Cheol. Whatever you say.” Wonwoo sighs and takes a sip of his drink.

“Well if I’m moping then what are you doing?” 

“Being antisocial.” Wonwoo laughs, and Seungcheol laughs with him.

A short time later, some girl slides up to Wonwoo, and starts flirting it up, making Wonwoo’s face go red, but he agrees to go dance with her, leaving Seungcheol sitting on the counter alone.

Seungcheol flicks through random social media posts, bored and avoiding jealous glances towards Jeonghan. He sits there for who knows how long, before he’s about to slide off the counter and leave, only to quite literally almost fall onto someone. It’s Jeonghan. 

Of course it’s Jeonghan. 

Seungcheol is sliding back onto the counter, until his head hits the upper cabinet behind him, and Jeonghan’s sliding up to Seungcheol, arms on either side of Seungcheol’s hips, bracing himself on the countertop beside Seungcheol, and leaning his face in. “Leaving so soon, baby?” Jeonghan purrs in Seungcheol’s ear. He nips at Seungcheol’s earlobe, and Seungcheol sighs. 

“You’re really trying this, Jeonghan?” His voice is quiet, and he’s not sure if he’s even heard over the loud music. 

“Yes. I want you, Cheollie.” Jeonghan purrs. Shivers run down Seungcheol’s spine, and he feels that warm feeling low in the pit of his stomach. 

“What happened to that guy you were dancing with?” Seungcheol tries, trying to reinforce his defenses against Jeonghan.

“I don’t care about  _ him,  _ Cheollie…” Jeonghan murmurs against his skin. “I want you to  _ fuck  _ me, Cheollie. Make an absolute mess out of me, Cheollie.  _ Wreck me. _ ”

“Jeonghan I- oh fuck…” Seungcheol lets out a breath as Jeonghan kisses his way down Seungcheol’s neck, stopping to nip at the spot right where his neck meets his shoulder, making sure to leave a little mark there. Any previous caution Seungcheol had was thrown to the wind. 

“Fine. No games this time. We’re leaving now.” Seungcheol mumbles, a feeling of shame tugging somewhere in the deepest recesses of his mind.

Seriously, Choi? You were supposed to stand your ground. Demand answers, want more than hormone filled, absolutely wonderful,  _ sex.  _ What is wrong with him? This desire is animalistic, and he’s not quite sure what to do about it anymore. Worry nags at his heartstrings. What if Jeonghan thinks he only wants him for sex? At the very least, Seungcheol wants to be friends with Jeonghan (though perhaps something more would be better).

“Cheol. You’re thinking again.” Jeonghan murmurs against his lips, as he drags Seungcheol off the counter. 

“Sorry. It’s just loud in here. Kinda distracting.” Seungcheol lies. More like loud in his brain. Jeonghan pulls him out into the icy night air. 

“My place is too far to walk to, from here. Let’s go to yours?” Jeonghan looks at him, and Seungcheol nods dumbly. Wonwoo would probably not be pleased with a stranger in their house, but Seungcheol reasons that it’s just Jeonghan. He talks enough about Jeonghan as it is, that Wonwoo practically knows him. 

Jeonghan tugs his hand, and they stumble towards the door of the frat house, and onto the sidewalk, making their way to Seungcheol’s apartment, Jeonghan’s hands all over Seungcheol the whole way there.

Seungcheol unlocks the door with trembling hands, and Jeonghan’s hands are trailing down his lower back and then grabbing onto Seungcheol’s ass, squeezing it.

“Has anyone told you that your ass is  _ phenomenal? _ Seriously, what did you do to get an ass like this?” Jeonghan giggles breathily against his shoulder, and Seungcheol pushes the door open, stepping inside while Jeonghan pushes him through the doorway.

“You think so?” Seungcheol finds himself smirking. Bad habits picked up from Jeonghan? Maybe.

“Hell yeah,” Jeonghan grabs his ass again, and then smacks it. “Wanna bite it.”

Seungcheol laughs at that. “Wow, okay.”

Jeonghan stops moving behind him and pushes him, spinning him around to face him, and pushes his back against the wall, and kisses him hungrily. Seungcheol hums, his hands slipping under Jeonghan’s shirt, and moving away to mouth at Jeonghan’s neck.

“Let’s get to my room, yeah?” Seungcheol says, voice low.

“Yeah,” Jeonghan smirks, and lets Seungcheol lead the way.

Seungcheol lays there, Jeonghan in his arms, a tangle of sheets and limbs. He runs his fingers through Jeonghan’s long, messy locks, twisting a few strands between his fingers, and gently massages his scalp.

Jeonghan hums in response. “Cheollie… what are you doing?” He murmurs softly, eyes half closed, the tiniest smile on his face.

“Dunno. Enjoying this moment, with you.” Seungcheol says in the softest, most timid voice.

“Hmm. You are?” Jeonghan asks, clearly half awake.

“Yeah… I don’t get much time like this with you,” Seungcheol mumbles. Silence lays out between them, winding between them, filling in all the gaps between them and caressing them just right. “What’s your favorite color, Han?” Seungcheol brushes the silence away.

“Lavender. Why?”

“Just wondering.”

The silence returns. “When is your birthday?”

“October 4th. When is yours?”

“August 8th.”

The silence is back again. 

“Tell me everything about you, Jeonghan. What was your childhood like? Where did you grow up? Cats or dogs?”

“Go to sleep, Cheol.”

“No, because we’ll wake up in the morning, and you’ll go away again…”

“I won’t go away tomorrow.”

“Just tell me stuff. I’m not tired.”

“Well…” Jeonghan says with a sigh. And so he begins, talking about the town he grew up in, and how his parents made him join band, and how much he misses the family dog, Mochi.

Seungcheol smiles, hearing him talk about everything. “What about your major? What are you doing in classes?”

“Well nothing, it’s the end of the semester, Cheol.”

“Just tell me more stuff. Anything you can think of.”

“We have practicals at the end of next semester. We get these sort of medical dummies and we treat them for an illness…” Jeonghan starts talking about his practicals, and all the things they have to do in a practical.

Seungcheol notices the silence is back, and he looks over to see Jeonghan’s eyes are closed, and he’s breathing the deep, slow breaths of sleep. A smile plays on Seungcheol’s lips, and he presses a gentle kiss to Jeonghan’s forehead, and snuggles in for the night.

Jeonghan is gone the next morning.

The cold of the empty bed beside him seeps into his skin and through to his bones. He feels it in his heart. He rolls over to check the time. 11:32.

A text from Jeonghan sits unread, so Seungcheol clicks it. 

_ I had to go, I had to catch the train home for break. Have a good holiday, Cheollie.  _

Seungcheol sighs. He knew he’d leave in the morning. At least this time, he wasn’t just running away.

Seungcheol has a holiday break, alright. Radio silence from Jeonghan the whole of break, despite how many times Seungcheol’s tried. 

_ Happy holiday, Hannie! Hope it goes well! _

Nothing.

_ Happy New Years! Here’s to a good one~ _

More nothing.

_ How is break? Hope you’re enjoying it _

Absolute silence. 

The worst part of it is, he’s read it all. Every last one of Seungcheol’s messages go read, but unanswered. Jeonghan’s posting pictures from the ski resort on his Instagram, warm stony hearths, snowy slopes, gorgeous mountain landscapes. 

And one post in particular, of a man, tucked in the crook of Jeonghan’s arm, sleeping soundly, and some cute heart eyes emojis for a caption.

Jeonghan had found someone. 

Perhaps that explains the radio silence.

Something hangs heavy in Seungcheol’s heart, something like perhaps sadness, or- heartache? He pushes the feeling away, closes the app on his phone, locks his phone, and sets it aside to finish packing to go back to college.

Upon arrival back at school, he’s met with a wonderful night in with Wonwoo, and questions of Jeonghan’s latest Instagram post.

“Listen. Just- just as someone watching from the outside in, I couldn’t help but notice that… you  _ liked _ Jeonghan. Like, more than a friend. And not just for a one night stand, or a regular hookup. I just… wanted to make sure you were okay?” Wonwoo prods gently. Seungcheol sighs.

“I don’t know, Wonwoo. I didn’t- I didn’t really realize that- that I had feelings for him, until that post, honestly… I mean… I knew subconsciously I think, but it wasn’t something I thought about, like  _ really  _ processed that I liked him, until that. But he- he just cut me off for break and that- it kinda hurt. It just- it hurts. A little…” Seungcheol sighs. 

Wonwoo nods and wraps him in a hug, and they lay on the couch for the night watching movies.

Classes start up the next day, and he meets up with Joshua and Vernon for lunch. They gather at the little sandwich shop down the street from the university, and Joshua can’t stop checking his phone. “Of course Jeonghan is late. When isn’t he?”

“Jeonghan is coming?” Seungcheol finds himself speaking the words before he’s even thought them, and Joshua freezes.

“Yeah, he said he wanted to brag to us about his ski trip,” Joshua shrugs. Seungcheol feels the tiniest pang of jealousy, but just nods.

“Oh, okay. I just thought it was going to be us three.” 

Jeonghan appears seemingly out of thin air, and plops in the chair beside Seungcheol. “Hey! What did you guys do for break?” He’s got that grin on his face, the one that makes Seungcheol’s heart race, with excitement.

“Vernon came home to LA with me!” Joshua grins. “My parents loved him.” Joshua rests his head on Vernon’s shoulder, and Vernon grins.

“It’s way warmer out there. It was a great break from the cold.” Vernon laughs lightly. 

“That’s nice. What about you, Cheollie?” Jeonghan looks to Seungcheol, and Seungcheol feels like he’s  _ sweating _ , like he’s in an interrogation. 

“I uh, well… I went back home, and I helped out in my family’s bakery. That’s… honestly all I did. My brother and his wife got a new puppy, so I puppy sat.”

“Really?! I want to see!” Joshua sits up, and makes grabby hands at Seungcheol’s phone. He pulls up a few pictures he took, and lets them pass the phone around. Vernon coos at his screen, and Joshua squeals. “He’s so freaking cute!”

“Yeah! He’s a handful though,” Seungcheol laughs. Jeonghan smiles a softer smile when he sees the phone.

“Cute,” he says, handing Seungcheol’s phone back. Seungcheol nearly drops the phone when his and Jeonghan’s hands brush, and his cheeks flush pink. Jeonghan begins on conversation of his ski slope adventures, complete with his mastery of the toughest course that he had struggled with for the last two years of ski trips. Seungcheol pretends that he’s not interested, but he can’t help but be enchanted by Jeonghan’s every word, lulled by his soft voice, and his intelligent words, and his genuine  _ excitement. _ He talks about a piano recital he had, and how he got to spend time with his old friends.

Just as he starts to being up his friends from back home, there’s a commotion behind the table, someone angrily shouting ‘watch where you’re going,’ and then an apology, and Joshua is staring, and his face is angry, and Seungcheol turns just in time to see a young man stumbling backwards, tripping over a chair leg, and falling, the little tray with a soup and a sandwich on it going flying, landing all over Seungcheol’s lap. He gasps, a little shocked. Luckily, it was a cold soup- or maybe not so luckily, since it’s only a whopping five degrees outside. 

The boy is standing, in a panic, and he’s apologizing profusely to Seungcheol, who can only stare blankly in shock and confusion. “What even just happened?”

“That asshole pushed him! Hey, get back here!” Joshua stands and shouts after the guy, who’s already walked briskly out the shop doors, clearly unhappy. 

“I didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry!” The small man before him is still frantically trying to mop the soup and trying to grab pieces of lettuce from Seungcheol’s hair, tears welling in his eyes, his face red with embarrassment. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Seungcheol gently pushes the other guy’s hands away, and keeps his voice low and soft and gentle, hoping to comfort him. “Accidents happen, it’s no big deal. Nothing a shower and a clean load of laundry won’t fix.” Seungcheol gives him a warm smile, and the other boy just apologizes again and wipes at his eyes with his sleeve. 

Seungcheol is almost grateful for the distraction, not wanting to hear about Jeonghan’s boyfriend anyways. 

Their group meets up a few times again after that, and Jeonghan even invites Seungcheol over a few times to watch the Lord of the Rings with him again, and then another time to have a marathon of a show that came out on Netflix that’s horror-related, and Jeonghan refused to watch alone. Apparently, this is one of Jeonghan’s warm streaks, but unfortunately for Seungcheol, he knows a cold shoulder is about to hit him again. 

The whole time, he just curls up in the crook of Seungcheol’s arm, hiding his face in Seungcheol’s chest and shoulder, hiding under the giant fluffy blanket. Surely, he thinks, Jeonghan must hear the racing of his heart. Seungcheol pays no attention to the movie, just watches Jeonghan, and plays with his hair, and holds him close to him. Seungcheol looks away, watching the snow fall outside the window for a while, the sounds of the show drifting faintly to his ears, but meaning nothing to him. 

He looks back to Jeonghan, to see him sleeping. The smallest, softest of smiles creeps onto Seungcheol’s lips, and he finds himself pressing a light kiss into Jeonghan’s forehead. “Rest up, darling,” Seungcheol whispers, and holds him close, his heart aching.

Joshua invites the group over for a small hangout a few weeks later, just after the beginning of February, and Seungcheol arrives with Seokmin and Chan in tow, dropping them by the TV, where a small group of Seungkwan and a few of his friends are playing video games. A few shot glasses are set out on the kitchen table, where Joshua and Vernon and some of their other English-speaking friends are hanging out. Vernon and Joshua are apparently both high, and refereeing a game of beer pong, demanding that the losers do body shots. 

“Hey, guys. I’m here.” Seungcheol says. 

“Oh, Jeonghan will be glad to hear that,” Vernon smirks, and Joshua hits his arm. 

“Shut up, Nonnie. Cheollie, you should play a game of beer pong!” He grins and pushes Seungcheol into the game, grinning. Seungcheol just blinks but obliges, and starts playing, unsure of who’s even on his team. Lucky for him, he’s the most sober of the group, so he’s doing a damn good job of getting the tiny white ball into the red solo cups at the other end of the table. It takes a good four rounds, but the other guy (whose name Seungcheol doesn’t even know) manages to land one in Seungcheol’s cup. He picks the cup up and throws it back, Joshua letting out a whoop of excitemint. 

“Now shit should be interesting!” Joshua laughs. Seungcheol sets the empty cup down to see Jeonghan standing beside the couple, and Seungcheol does a double take. His hair is  _ short now _ , and silver, and it’s not even chin-length, it’s styled in a middle part, and framing his face, and just brushing the tops of his ears. If Seungcheol thought he was beautiful before, he’s closer to gorgeous now, and he looks much less soft, there’s something sharp to his look now, an edge to his otherwise gentle, soft appearance. 

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to play,” Jeonghan says, stepping in for someone on the opposite team. He’s standing opposite Seungcheol, and Seungcheol  _ knows _ he’s sober, because he’s got that cold look in his eyes again, the one that somehow give a physical object to his recent cold streak.

“You’re on, Yoon.” Seungcheol smirks, and takes his turn, still sober enough to be good at landing the ball in the cup. Jeonghan rolls his eyes but picks up the cup and tosses the contents back. It’s not really beer, whatever’s in the cups, but it’s not the usual burn of anything harder than beer, and it’s mixed with something fruity. It’s not bad, better than the cheap beer they usually have at these parties. 

Jeonghan takes his turn, bouncing the ball off the table and into the very center cup. “I’d like to see you try, Choi.” Jeonghan smirks, and Seungcheol feels something flare up inside him, a weird competitive streak that he doesn’t think he’s really ever experienced before, but he almost likes the feeling.

Seungcheol’s partner throws it back, and takes his turn, missing by a mile, making Seungcheol groan and take one of the cups set aside, and toss it back. Jeonghan’s partner goes, but misses as well, and then Jeonghan has to tip a cup back. 

They go for another round, before Jeonghan and Seungcheol are shooting competitive remarks back and forth and their partners are practically no longer involved, and looking back, Seungcheol knows they left shortly after that, already too drunk anyways to really keep playing. Seungcheol lands another ball in the cup, his shots becoming a little less accurate the past round or two, as the alcohol settles in his system. He’s only got two cups left now, to Jeonghan’s four. 

Jeonghan tips the cup back, and then tosses it aside, and takes his shot, landing one. Seungcheol picks up the red plastic cup, and swallows the contents down, narrowing Jeonghan’s targets down to three. Seungcheol takes the ball and blinks, focusing in on one of the two cups. 

He misses.

Side cup down.

Jeonghan goes, missing his target.

Jeonghan takes a side drink. 

Seungcheol makes another go, landing it in a cup. 

Jeonghan drinks it down. 

Three to one. Seungcheol’s got this. 

Jeonghan lands his next shot.

Two to one. Seungcheol drinks. 

Seungcheol let’s out a sound as he pushes the empty cup aside, and picks up the ball, focusing his aim in as best as he can, with his lacking coordination. He tosses it, and it bounces off the table, and in a completely different direction than the cup. Too light. 

Seungcheol drinks, and Jeonghan makes a move. 

He lands it. Seungcheol drinks again. 

One to one.

This is it. Seungcheol launches the ball. It sinks into the cup with a little ‘ker-plunk’.

Seungcheol pumps his fist in the air as Jeonghan swallows down the contents of his cup. 

“Loser does a body shot!” Vernon shouts, and the small crowd around the table cheers. Seungcheol hadn’t noticed that everyone had gathered around for their game. Jeonghan smirks, and shrugs, walking over to the table with the shot-supplies on it.

“Well, lay down then, Cheollie,” Jeonghan purrs. Seungcheol, now rather intoxicated, obliges, climbing onto the table. Jeonghan grabs at the hem of Seungcheol’s shirt, and pulls it up over Seungcheol’s head, dropping it on the floor next to the table. He pushes Seungcheol back on the table, a bit forcefully, making Seungcheol lie down. 

“You been working out over break, Cheollie?”Jeonghan runs his hands along Seungcheol’s chest and abdomen, noting the slight definition of his abs, which were much more faint a few months ago, when they’d last hooked up. 

Seungcheol nods. “Not much else to do back home,” he says quietly. 

“It’s a good look on you,” Jeonghan winks, seemingly unbothered by the crowd, but Seungcheol could feel their eyes on his every move. A blush creeps up Seungcheol’s cheeks, and he watches as Jeonghan picks up the salt shaker, and licks a stripe up Seungcheol’s abs. Seungcheol can feel every muscle of his rippling under Jeonghan’s tongue, as he shivers at the feeling of his hot wet tongue streaking up his bare skin. Jeonghan taps the salt out of the shaker, all over Seungcheol’s body. Seungcheol ignores as some of it bounces off his skin, leaving a weird feeling behind. 

Jeonghan seems satisfied with the amount of salt that’s stuck to Seungcheol’s skin, and he begins uncapping the tequila bottle, pouring himself out a shot, and setting it aside. He grabs a lime wedge from the bowl they’re in, and sets it in Seungcheol’s mouth between Seungcheol’s teeth, smirking at the crowd. He sets his hands on either side of Seungcheol’s hips, and ducks his head down, leaning in just above his belly button. Seungcheol picks his head up, craning his neck to look down at Jeonghan, his eyes locked on Jeonghan’s, watching intently.

Jeonghan breaks eye contact for just a second, looking down at Seungcheol’s torso, as he leans in the rest of the way, his tongue meeting the salty strip along Seungcheol’s body. His eyes look up to meet Seungcheol’s once again, and Jeonghan licks over that same stripe again, this time much slower, and Seungcheol’s body feels like it’s on fire. Desire pools in deep in his gut again, and something tries to swat away the drunken fog in his brain, to remind him of  _ something _ , but Seungcheol is far too intoxicated to try and remember it now. 

Jeonghan moves away from Seungcheol just as he reaches Seungcheol’s diaphragm , eyes still on Seungcheol’s, as he grabs up the shot, and tips it back, eyes fluttering shut as he does so. Seungcheol watches the bob of his throat as it slides down, and how Jeonghan’s eyes crunch just a bit at the burn. And then he’s moving up, his hands resting on Seungcheol’s shoulder, and he leans in, taking the lime into his mouth, his lips pressing into Seungcheol’s faintly.

Seungcheol tastes just a few drops of lime juice as Jeonghan bites into the lime, and sucks the juice from the tangy citrus. Jeonghan pulls away, taking the lime with him, and tosses it onto the table. The crowd cheers, and then there’s a return to the chatter of a crowd, and someone declaring the next game of beer pong. All the while, Jeonghan stares into Seungcheol’s eyes, before leaning in and kissing Seungcheol for real now.

Seungcheol’s hands go up to his freshly dyed, freshly cut hair, and it’s a strange feeling, not silky smooth like his long locks had been, but now a weird mixture of dry, from the bleach, but full and soft at the ends, which are healthy from their fresh cut, and Seungcheol pulls on it, like he had done all those months ago with Jeonghan’s long hair, and Jeonghan lets out a breath into the kiss, and tangles his tongue with Seungcheol’s.

He tastes like lime and tequila, no surprise there. 

They makeout in the middle of the party, Seungcheol shirtless and laying on the shots table, for Seungcheol doesn’t know how long, before Jeonghan pulls away to pepper kisses along Seungcheol’s jaw and neck.

“Let’s get out of here, yeah? It’s been too long,” Jeonghan’s voice is soft and breathless as he pulls away.

“Fuck yeah,” Seungcheol says, sliding off the table and stumbling a little, from lack of coordination. He swipes his shirt off the ground and tugs it over his head, not giving a shit if it’s inside out or not, since in a few minutes, it’d be on the floor of his bedroom, forgotten anyhow. They stumble to Seungcheol’s apartment, since it’s closest, and they can’t seem to keep their hands off one another. 

Seungcheol makes a mental note to apologize to Wonwoo later, since he was definitely sitting on the couch when the two of them burst through the door unannounced, Seungcheol already trying to pull Jeonghan’s shirt over his head, as they stumbled towards Seungcheol’s bedroom. Seungcheol kicks his bedroom door shut, and they stagger to the bed, Seungcheol pushing Jeonghan down onto the bed, kissing him again, leaving little marks along Jeonghan’s skin, before he tugs the shirt over his head, and kisses all down Jeonghan’s body.

“Fuck, your tongue is so  _ hot _ , Jeonghan. The shit that made me feel, when you- oh my god…” Seungcheol’s mouth fumbles drunkenly through his words, while his hands fumble drunkenly to get the buttons on Jeonghan’s pants undone. 

“You liked that, huh Cheollie?” Jeonghan seems so composed, and Seungcheol finds it unfair. But he knows Jeonghan is just as drunk as he is, off the alcohol, and the lust. Seungcheol finally gets Jeonghan’s pants off, and kisses along his thighs, biting marks into his skin rather harshly, loving the softness of his body on this thighs, not that they were fat, but they weren’t as bony as the rest of his body, and they were supple enough to have give, and be just a little plushy-feeling. 

He also has a particular love for the sounds it draws from Jeonghan. Jeonghan’s hands are carding frantically through Seungcheol’s hair, tugging a bit, as Seungcheol teases around Jeonghan’s boxers. 

“Stop fucking around and get to the point,  _ please,  _ Cheollie,” Jeonghan practically begs. Seungcheol moves away to hover over Jeonghan, taking in the whole sight of him, his skin illuminated by the moonlight, giving the coolest blue tint to his normally light golden skin tone. His silver hair shines in the moonlight, reflecting the rays of the moon in it’s own aura. Starlight dusts over Jeonghan’s cheekbones, giving his face an other-worldly glow. 

“You’re ethereal, Jeonghan. I could look at you forever, every last inch of you is beautiful,” Seungcheol’s voice is significantly softer, and more controlled, and his words flow from his mouth without a problem, as though he were sober as could be. Jeonghan stares up at him, and again, there’s that confliction in his eyes, the worry, the fear, but they flicker back into the warm fire of desire, and he leans up, grabbing Seungcheol’s face and kissing him hard, dragging him back in, occupying him with the task at hand. 

Seungcheol lays there in the moonlight, Jeonghan tucked neatly into his arms, the two of them buried under four blankets, hair wet from the shower, clothes be damned, sharing one another’s body heat. He looks at the way Jeonghan’s long lashes just brush his cheekbones, and the way his chest rises and falls with breaths of sleep. 

“Jeonghan, I don’t think you’ll ever know how much I care about you… It sounds stupid, but I like you a lot…” Seungcheol whispers to the sleeping face before him, before he decides that he should get some sleep too. 

At least Seungcheol thought Jeonghan was asleep. 

Jeonghan is gone in the morning, not even a text to explain his disappearance. Seungcheol feels something aching deep down in his chest, and then it hits him. Jeonghan  _ has a boyfriend. _ And last night, Jeonghan  _ slept with Seungcheol. _ Oh fuck, Seungcheol has royally fucked this one over. Seungcheol scrambles to pick up his phone, opening Jeonghan’s contact, and calling him. 

He’s sent to voicemail after two rings.

“Shit... shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!” Seungcheol hisses, hitting call again. Straight to voicemail. Seungcheol sets his phone aside, his head in his hands, and he scrubs at his face, feeling distressed. “What the fuck am I gonna do?” Seungcheol whispers. 

“Wonu!” Seungcheol practically wails, tugging on sweatpants and a t-shirt, and stumbling out of his room. “Wonwoo!” Seungcheol sees Wonwoo scramble out of his room. 

“What? What’s wrong?” He looks a tad bit panicked, but his eyes soften when he sees Seungcheol’s watering eyes, and his crumpled expression. 

“I fucked up, Wonwoo… Jeonghan has a boyfriend, and we had sex last night, and- oh god, I’m a  _ home wrecker! _ ” Seungcheol wails, tears spilling from his eyes. Wonwoo hurries over and wraps him up, and guides him to the couch. 

“You’re not a  _ home wrecker _ , Seungcheol. How much of a home can it be when they just got together over break?” Wonwoo tries, but Seungcheol just cries harder.

“What if they were together before that?! And nobody knew?! I’m a horrible person!” Seungcheol cries. Wonwoo sighs, and holds him close, wrapping a blanket around the two of them. “He’s never going to speak to me again, Wonu… And it- it  _ hurts _ , I like him so much…” Seungcheol sniffles, his head on Wonwoo’s shoulder. 

“Shh, it’s alright, Cheol.”

Jeonghan, as expected, ghosts Seungcheol for the rest of the semester, pretty much, and Seungcheol doesn’t see him again until the end of the year bash, which is almost as big as the Halloween bash, and thrown by the same frat. Jeonghan appears before him in a cloud of smoke, his silver hair longer, and full of waves, and the tiniest silver band sits around the crown of his head, like a halo on an angel. Angel he’s not, however, with skin tight leather jeans, a black crop top, with  _ Balenciaga _ written across it in plain black writing. 

Seungcheol practically drools over him. He’s a sight to behold, a temptation and a heartache, all at once. How badly he wants to kiss the lips, the ones that are formed into his signature smirk, as he dances with someone in the crowd- perhaps it’s Seokmin, Seungcheol can’t tell but the guy looks to be about Seungcheol’s height. Seungcheol sighs, and makes his way into the kitchen, hoping to find Wonwoo, but unfortunately, Seungcheol remembers that Wonwoo came here with his new girlfriend, so he’s probably out dancing with her, or something.

Seungcheol hops onto the counter, taking a sip from the beer he found in the fridge, and watches the people around him. Nobody pays any attention to him, so Seokmin’s ‘makeover’ seems to have failed. Seokmin had begged him to let him do his makeup, and style his hair up out of his face, and put him in some ridiculous outfit. Had it been up to Seungcheol, he’d have just worn his usual jeans and a t-shirt, but Seokmin had insisted on some tight faux-turtleneck top, that barely reached the tops of his jeans, and if he raises his arms above his head, half his torso is on display. Seokmin claimed it was perfect, that it was to ‘show off his efforts from the gym,’ and had paired it with light blue jeans that were ripped to hell, and he tried to talk him into  _ fishnets _ underneath, but Seungcheol had stubbornly refused.

He barely let Seokmin put  _ eye makeup _ on him. Seungcheol finds makeup ridiculous, if whoever created whatever wanted people to have wings on their eyes, or sparkles all over their eyelids, then they would have. Makeup has always seemed unnecessary to Seungcheol. 

He’s brought out of his thoughts by someone grabbing his hands. “Cheol! What are you just sitting there for? Seokmin made you look so good, you can’t waste it by sitting in the corner!” Chan grins at him, and pulls him off the counter. “Finish your beer and dance!”

“Chan I can’t dance!” Seungcheol groans, but finishes of his beer (his second for the evening), and lets Chan tug him to the mass of people dancing. He spots Jeonghan as he passes, and gets sucked into the writhing riot of people in the living room, moving all in different ways, but still to the beat of the song pumping through the speakers. 

Chan twirls around Seungcheol with a laugh, and Seungcheol sways along, not feeling 100 percent with it. “Let loose, Cheollie! Dance with some people!  _ Flirt! _ ” Chan winks, and grabs Seungcheol’s hands, moving his arms with Chan’s in some cute little dance, laughing. 

Seungcheol finds himself laughing, and bouncing a little to the beat.

“Yes, Cheol! Shake your booty!” Chan laughs harder, and Seungcheol laughs right along with him, loudly, and happily, and a few people around Seungcheol turn to notice Seungcheol, whose hips are swinging to the beat, and his arms are up above his head, as he lets the music move him. He can feel a few people’s eyes on him, his shirt riding up to expose his belly button and the cut of his hips, his jeans low on them, and the lines of muscle under his shirt. Maybe those beers were hitting him, because he doesn’t feel even slightly self-conscious of the amount of skin he’s showing. He just  _ dances. _

Someone approaches him, asking him to dance, and Seungcheol accepts. He’s tall,  _ really _ tall, and he’s got a face like a model, with puppy eyes, and shoulders that are broad, and he’s got designer clothes on, and he smells like Chanel cologne. Seungcheol could drink this man in, forget about his previous heartache. 

“Name is Mingyu. Yours?” His voice is deep, and full, and  _ gorgeous.  _ He’s  _ hot _ , there’s no other words for it.

“Seungcheol,” he finds himself breathing out, a smirk on his lips. He sways his hips to the rhythm of the music, his hands all over Mingyu’s chest and shoulders, not like he’s that much shorter than Mingyu, but Mingyu had a couple inches on him at least. They dance for a short while, occasionally exchanging small chat, like ‘what’s your major?’ and ‘how do you like it in bed?’, to which Seungcheol just laughs, and he’s not sure how that sound came out of him, because it’s sultry, and low, and almost sugary, a sound he’s never heard from his own throat before. 

He turns away, to grind his ass into Mingyu, throwing it in a circle, a bit, feeling how it jiggles and wiggles behind him, and Mingyu’s hands on his waist tighten a bit, and he can tell that he wants to and he hears an all-too-familiar laugh.

“Are you  _ twerking _ , Seungcheol?”

Jeonghan. Of course it’s Jeonghan. 

And of course, Seungcheol can’t help but let his head snap in the direction of his voice, and he’s smirking, arms crossed, staring at Seungcheol. 

“I’d like to see that later tonight, looks like Mingyu’s brought out a new side of you, Cheollie,” Jeonghan winks, and gives Mingyu a warm smile, passing him an unopened beer, and Seungkwan pokes out from behind Jeonghan. “Mingyu, I brought you a beer. This is my friend Seungkwan, care to dance?”

Seungcheol watches the way that Seungkwan’s cheeks flush, with embarrassment, or nerves, but watches as Mingyu smiles warmly. “Sounds good. Nice to meet you, Seungkwan.” He holds a hand out to Seungkwan and they slip into the crowd. Jeonghan turns his attention to Seungcheol. 

“Fuck, you’re naughty, Seungcheol.”

“Ew, don’t say that,” Seungcheol laughs, pretending not to be embarrassed or mad about whatever cockblock Jeonghan just performed. Jeonghan smirks and tugs Seungcheol close to him, rolling his hips in time with the music, right up into Seungcheol’s. Guilt plays through Seungcheol’s heart, and his head, and sadness fills his mind.

“Mingyu has that effect on people, huh? You not planning on bottoming anymore, hmm? That right, Cheollie? You wanna  _ fuck me? _ ” Jeonghan nips at his earlobe, and Seungcheol falls for it, he really almost does, he feels the cracks in the walls he put up widening, and parts of them are crumbling. 

“Fuck, I-” Seungcheol stops himself. “No.”

“What?”

That stops Jeonghan dead in his tracks. 

“No, I don’t want to, Jeonghan… I mean- I do, fucking  _ hell _ I want to so bad-”

“Then stop talking. Stop thinking. Just do it.”

“ _ No, Jeonghan. _ I can’t. Not- not if what happened last time is going to happen again,” Seungcheol shakes his head, “I need to go, Jeonghan.” Seungcheol slips out of Jeonghan’s grip and starts making his way out of the crowd, so he can head to the front door and get the hell out of this party. 

He makes it out the door, out of the crowds, and starts down the path in the yard that leads to the sidewalk, when he hears footsteps, and someone grabbing his arm. “Choi Seungcheol, don’t just say that and walk away, what the hell do you mean?” Jeonghan scolds. 

“I mean, Jeonghan, you  _ ghosting me. _ I mean, I know why you did it, I get it, I- I probably fucked a lot of shit up for you, I- shit I felt so guilty, and dirty, and- I  _ cried _ , I felt like such a home wrecker,” Seungcheol chuckles, but bitterness rings out.

“ _ Home wrecker?!” _ Jeonghan practically shouts. “What the hell are you on about, Seungcheol?!”

“Your boyfriend!” Seungcheol huffs. 

“I don’t have a fucking boyfriend, Seungcheol!”

“Really? What about the guy from winter break? The one with the heart eyes, the one that was sleeping in your arms?!”

“ _ Minhyuk?! _ Oh my god, Seungcheol, you’re not- you didn’t think- he’s my  _ best fucking friend _ , I’ve known him since we were six, I would never date him, holy  _ hell _ , Seungcheol, do you always jump to conclusions like that?!”

“Well you did  _ ghost me _ , and you didn’t say otherwise before that! I thought- I thought I ruined everything, you wouldn’t even talk to me to be  _ friends _ with me, and that  _ hurt even more _ , because, yeah, the sex is great and whatever, but I don’t just want sex!”

“And  _ that’s _ why I ghosted you, Seungcheol! I wasn’t asleep that night, when you told me how much you like me. I- I fuck up too many good things, and I’m  _ afraid _ , because you’re this perfect guy, you’re hilarious and you care so much about everyone around you and you’re responsible, and you love like you’re going to spend the rest of your life with that person, even if you know you won’t, and you’ll watch Lord of the Rings no matter how many times I make you, and you play with my hair, and you’re incredibly  _ sexy _ , and you’re smart and you have a way with words that makes me  _ swoon! _ You’re literally too perfect, and I can’t- I know, that you like me, and I’m- fuck, Seungcheol, I’m in  _ love _ with you, in some backwards ass way, and- I’m terrified to have any sort of relationship with you.

“Relationships never end well with me, and you’re too good for me, I know that- that if I get you, if i can be with you, and I fuck it up, then I’ll never find someone as good as you. And that would mean losing you, and I don’t know if I can handle that thought. Because you’re  _ perfect _ , and someone out there deserves you.”

“Don’t you dare say it’s not you, Jeonghan.”

“But it’s  _ not me! _ Don’t you see Seungcheol?”

“No, I don’t. Jeonghan, you’re beautiful, and you’re- a giant fucking nerd, and I  _ love that _ , and you’re so friendly, and your smile lights up the whole world, and you have so many layers, that you don’t show to the world, and I want to see every one of them. You’re goofy, when you want to be, when you let some of your defenses down, and you’re so  _ funny _ , and you’re confident and know what you want, and you’re sassy and you speak your mind. 

“And you’re so damn intelligent, you play, what, four instruments? And you’re a  _ nurse, _ for fucks sake, you know so much about so many things, and you’re talented! You’re just as good for me as I am for you, Jeonghan… We  _ click, _ we balance one another out, we- we belong together…” Seungcheol looks at him, his eyes wide, and full of sincerity. 

“Don’t say things like that, Seungcheol. You can’t predict the future.” Jeonghan sounds defeated, now, and he looks away from Seungcheol. 

“And neither can you… Look, I understand, if you don’t want to be together, but I don’t think it could hurt to  _ try _ , at least. And- and we can try the friends thing, but- you can’t just keep ghosting me to avoid getting hurt… don’t be afraid to fall, Han…”

“I already did fall, Seungcheol. I- there’s really nothing to fear now, except fucking it up…”

“And you can’t assume it’s your fault if something goes wrong, Jeonghan. It takes two to tango, and if something goes wrong, it means that neither of us were paying attention to the other person, and neither of us were being adult enough to work things out, or neither of us were listening to the other.”

“Fuck, I don’t deserve you… You’re wise beyond your years, Seungcheol,” Jeonghan’s eyes are watering, and a few tears slip down his cheeks. 

“Please, let us try, Jeonghan. Just try it.”

“I… yeah. Okay. Let’s be boyfriends, Cheollie,” Jeonghan sniffles, and a little smile plays on his lips, not a smirk, like usual. A genuine, soft, happy smile.

“That sounds great to me,” Seungcheol smiles back, and pulls Jeonghan close, his forehead pressed against Jeonghans, before he presses the softest kiss to Jeonghan’s lips. 

**Author's Note:**

> I felt like I needed to write something svt again because it's been a while. Follow me on twitter to hear me scream about dumb shit @youknow_yunho


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